What a LAZZZZZYYYYY Day

So I apologise for being so tardy with updating this. I tried last night but the Internet wasn't working all that well and actually deleted it all right before I hit "post" Just a littler mad, but as they say here in Jamaica to No end - NO PROBLEM!

I was telling everyone my master piece I composed, how it would rival the great literature's throughout time...War & Peace...The Catcher in the Rye....Harley Davidson's 100 years and so forth. Just thinking about it now makes me feel like I have reached my written pinnacle, you know the feeling Sir Edmond Hillary had upon reaching the summit of Mount Everest. A Love hate thing...happy you finally made it, reached that goal, but yet sad and let down that "now what?"

So let me try to recapture that lost glory the best I can:

Yesterday after the show we did the usual, go get changed, go eat, grab a drink and head to the pool. The weather hasn't been all sunshine, but more so than not. With or without it still is really hot and with nearly 100% humidity, you always stink (except Chelsea, Joan and Tamara)

We kicked around a few hours then had to meet up at the dock for a Party Cruise for just the radio weirdo's. It was a giant Catamaran and it had not trouble at all fitting over 60 of us on board. In fact there was plenty of room to spare! Now I'm not too macho to admit I was not feeling totally psyched about going on this as I'm a true land lubber to the core. I don't eat things that come from the water and I don't really like being on open water. I put on my big boy pants and stepped on board, sticking near the edge and scouting out the best places to hurl. Anchors away they yelled! Well not really but it's more dramatic... anyway the ship set sail with the lot of us from this Jamaican isle...with Jamaican guy, the skipper too, the radio guy and his wife, didn't see a movie star, the bartender man and the Sheriff man, here on Sandals Cruise!

The seas were rough this day, angry like an old man sending soup back to the kitchen angry! I was not feeling too bad despite this and once we hit open water, the swells got really big. It's hard to say for sure but I would have to say at least 10-15 feet as this boat was a rocking! There were a few people who grabbed the glad bag and made it to the curb on time. Everyone avoided them like they were lepers tough as most people see/smell puke - do puke! The scenery was really great from this vantage point thought!

 With the waves getting pretty big, they headed off closer to shore where calmer waters prevailed. We sailed past where Dunn's River Falls empties itself into the Caribbean going from fresh to unusable salt water in seconds. Now let me digress for a minute. Dunn's River Falls - one of Jamaica's most prized and beautiful attractions and rightfully so. Here is my issue - pay your $10 admission, walk to the beach and start climbing a waterfall full of rushing (and at time VERY forcefully rushing water!), climbing slimy slippery rocks, walking through rock crevices that could snap an ankle like a twig with the wrong movement, NO lifeguards, NO instructions given, NO one watching from the side, NO life vests, NO NOTHING! Can you imagine the waivers you would have to sign in Canada to do this!!First off you wouldn't be allowed to and secondly you would be totally wrapped in life vests, strapped to a metal cable and have you foot gently dipped into the water...that's right after you did 5 hours of legal papers and signed waivers galore! So If you have never been there in person, here is one picture to help you understand these are not quite gentle flowing cascades of water trickling across the landscape, but raging waters blasting down the steep precipice of rocks!

The same is for other tours we took like the Jungle Quad...here's a quad why don't you hop on and follow us through the jungle at break neck speeds. After about 30 minutes someone finally asks "Is there anyone who has never driven a quad before?" Then we go cliff diving! Oh that's right..stand on the edge of a cliff some 25 feet in the air and jump into the ocean...not in a calm secluded picture perfect bay, but on the shore of open water with waves crashing down around you, pounding into the shore then dragging all out to sea! Off you go, jump!! The only thing told was to try to jump away from the cliff as far as you can because there are rocks below! No one asked if we can swim, no life jackets around, no Lifeguard on duty...just jump off a cliff into the ocean!

No I'm not complaining since I gladly and willingly did both with GREAT satisfaction and would totally recommend to anyone to do these...I just think about wacky stuff like how we could never do these things in North America, because apparently people don't have common sense and personal responsibility to think and do for themselves what they know they can and what is right. Maybe Jamaica has it all figured out?? No Problem Man!

Once we finally reached land after a thoroughly enjoyable cruise for 99.5% of those on board (There was one lady who was SOOOOO

LOL All I know is they have booked virtually every possible excursion you can!!

After our cruise they hosted a beach party for about 700 people. The whole beach was transformed into this incredible dining experience! Lights strung everywhere, beaches groomed like a golf course green, tables with linen and wine on every table. Oh, the food - INSANE! I have no idea how they can get that much food ready for so many people at exactly the right time, outdoors on a beach. Amazing! The food was beyond top notch with roast pig, carved beef, crab legs, lobster, 5,000 different desserts, and about 100 more things!

Now you know when someone says they had a shrimp boat where they ate...well here they really do have a shrimp boat - three of them to be exact and they really are real boats FULL!!!

Seemed everyone was pretty pooped after a long day. The sun really beats away at you and I think by 11:30 we were all back in our rooms like a bunch of seniors after three games of bingo.

It's been a really incredible experience so far. So many areas to see since this resort is massive (Google earth it!!) There are several fine dining rooms here as well that require fancy clothes and reservations. People told us when we got here to go book times as it fills up fast - we didn't now most of them are booked. We did get into a couple here and there and are all trying to go out tonight to a place called the China Doll that is a Ukrainian/Bulgarian joint (no just kidding, it's Chinese food)

Trevor and Tamara as well as Chelsea and the Sheriff went off for couples massages today so help ease the pain of having to wake up, get shuttled to the beach, have a fresh buffet waiting for you, and broadcast three gruelling hours of radio feet away from the ocean...you can clearly see why these days here at Sandals Beach Club are so hard to deal with!

Garth